Issues with the old ear

Just come back from my 5th visit to the Ear, Nose and Throat specialist, and it’s finally beginning to show signs of improvement.

First of all, it’s a scary place! Very crowded (mainly full of young kids), one doctor and about 10 nurses helping him. You all queue up at the door and he checks you out in a big room, so everyone stares at you (especially when you’re a foreigner – felt very much on show).

But the scary thing was, the place and equipment was soooo old! Like some mixture of a Victorian hospital and a torture chamber! I kept expecting the doors to be suddenly locked and a tv wheeled out and the guy from Saw appearing telling me I have to kill my way out. Lots of old metal tubes, cones and pointed things, and all around the edge the strangest medical equipment I’ve seen! One old lady was sitting mouth agape in front of a tube that was spewing out steam, an old guy was holding two large cone shaped things, which were plugged into the wall, against his ears, and someone else had two rubber tubes placed in their ears which was attached to some sort of pump that looked like a miniature oil pump!

All very odd. As I said, it’s an open room, with a couple of chairs next to the torture equipment, so you can see what the docs doing to the current patient. And unfortunately he was clamping the guys nose open and forcing a very long cotton bud down his nasal passage, then using a vacuum tube to suck stuff out. I felt sick just looking at it – the cotton bud was very long, and must have gone halfway into his brain! This seemed to be a popular treatment as the doc did this to nearly everyone that sat in the chair! I was about to bolt for the door.

Thankfully, he just wanted to stick the long probe down my ear and scrape about in their. That was unpleasant enough. He scribbled something on my medical report and I was herded by some nurses to a 200Watt lightbulb that I sat next to for 5 minutes (to kill infection apparently). Just seemed to give me a very pink ear.

Anyway, as I said, just came back from my 5th visit. On the last visit, he decided to cut a hole in my eardrum!

So I was given a local anaesthetic in the ear hole and then they plugged in a metal probe that was connected to some antiquated battery thing and my wrist.

Thankfully the anaesthetic worked so I didn’t feel him cut the tiny hole (1mm he said), but I did feel him vacuuming the liquid through the hole! Not nice. Shouldn’t complain though, he said he was going to do a baby’s ear later, and the baby couldn’t have the local anaesthetic as they were too young! Poor thing.

Oh, the previous visit I also had my hearing tested – had to sit in a small booth, with headphones and press a button when I heard some music at different pitches. That was fun.

Today I got to find out what the strange equipment (that I mentioned earlier) was all for. The cone shaped things that are plugged in, are basically mini 200watt heaters like I had earlier. The rubber tubes were bizarre though. They massage the ear to relieve pressure. The machine they’re hooked up too, creates a thumping noise, like you hear on submarine movies from the engines going at full speed ahead.

That was fun. But did that just for one minute (timed by egg timer of course!).

All told, and interesting if not particularly pleasant experience. Still can’t hear properly, but it is improving slowly.

The other thing that was odd…my name. I have to write it in katakana (actually my gf does), but they nearly always get it wrong. I was Bill Pullman in one clinic! How they got Bill from Jim I don’t know.

Hopefully pretty soon I won’t have to lipread my students anymore and will be able to find out if they are actually speaking English correctly!
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Comments (1)

No, Not my Ear Again! | Balloon Shapes By CopsJanuary 10th, 2010 at 10:07 pm

[…] if anyone has been reading this since last year, when I had my first encounter with the Japanese torture room ear, nose and throat clinic but I really didn’t want to go through that […]

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